Welcome to Gulf Breeze, Florida; home to spaceship Earth’s nuttier residents. You just know something’s hinky when Klingon is the native language. So do yourself a favor and get some medication; you’re going to need it. Mysteries abound. What does a strung-out actor, the Movie Caddyshack, a terrorist attack and U.F.O.s have in common? Wink-wink. Why is Rudi, with an i not a y, a constant source of s&@t in your pants terror? Learn about the “Goldfish Story”. Who’s in the Candy-Cane Cartel – the criminal world’s laughing stock? What happens when Johnny “Screwball” Tong loses his anxiety pills? Is Frodo a panther, a cat or a mutant? When did Jalipeño become the sexual safe word? Why is Paco so afraid of Florida? Who would win in a knock-out-drag between a bull-shark and a crocodile? Want to learn how to cook-up the perfect pot brownie recipe? A priest dressed as a Cylon? Come on in. Naked strippers jumping from a plane? Got you covered. Baked DEA agents? In spades, baby. Gladiators, Vikings, Greeks and dwarves on a sex-fuel alcohol siege of epic proportions. El Bandido Pollito; Bang-Bang! Sex, guns, dope, Florida trivia, booze, TNT, rim-jobs, apes with grenades, drinking games, Spring-Break and Saturday Night Live. Yes, that’s Viggo, the imaginary sea-monkey. Strap yourself in, lose the shades and buy this book. Yes, you perverted drug-fiend, this is your fix. Sheer lunacy burning in your hands. A Mexican jumping bean of excitement. PINK ALIENS; the froth spewing orgasm of the literary world. Trust me, it’s better than smack.